1990s · Al Pacino · Comedy · Ex-offenders · Feminism (white + black and everything in between) · Film · Garry Marshall · Gender & Society · Mental health · Michelle Pfieffer · NYC · Social demography · Socie Dinner Party · Working class

Socie Dinner Party: Frankie and Johnny (1991). Or, Michelle Pfieffer is such a MILF. Or, Al Pacino is such a Cougar.

Thursday, March 16, 2017
Ann Arbor, Michigan

  • Days since Pine Rest: 14
  • Marital status: Divorce as soon as possible
  • Spiritual status: Judaism
  • Individual status: Jeannie. No more, no less.
  • Dietary status: Pizza and root beer
  • Drug status: Coffee and cigarettes
  • Mood: Stable
  • Personality:  Jeannie
  • Sexuality: Baths–hot, steamy bubble baths. Showers need not apply.
  • American status: So fucking American in so many ways.
  • Feminist status: Garry Marshall films. Penny Marshall films, too.
  • Hipster status: Oh, baby I like it raw . . .

Frankie’s off to Altuna, PA to help christen some baby, Thomas. The Godfather I & II undertones. Jeez. Johnny was in the slammer, but a great short-order cook. haha Warnings regarding NYC and they hate losing a good cook like Johnny. Freedom = fresh air.

Post-christening. All the baby talk. Michelle Pfieffer’s baby sister is playing her on-screen baby sister. Frankie and Mom at the kitchen sink. Momma worried. Frankie is a grown-ass woman who lets her mother off the hook for clinical depression. Sheesh. Brush/wash your hair once in a while, Frankie.

She takes a bus back to NYC. Oh, shit. Johnny’s there. Hotness. Haha requisite police alarms in the distance. This guy was Serpico; he’ll be fine. Goddamn, that’s a long bus ride. Why not the train? Oh, right. She’s poor and poor people travel by Greyhound. Ever been on one of those? Ethnographers should take Greyhound bus rides across the country, not buy dogs, to talk to poor people.

Frankie walks around catcallers–they been doing that in NYC for a while, you know? One of the old waitresses is sick again. The owner has an Eastern European accent. That’s what’s-his-name from Chicago Hope–I think he’s Hispanic. Oh my god! The black guy from Showgirls is in this.

Some creepy lady with all the great one-liners checks in. Frankie makes an immigration joke, then Garry Marshall makes an immigration joke. Frankie can talk to anybody. Oh, shit. Here comes Johnny with all his ex-offender hotness. He causes a pileup and an old man fight. Scorcese’s and Woody Allen’s NYC. Not the monster Guiliani created.

Al Pacino, and that beautiful face, gets hired. Uh-oh. Tough talk for ex-offenders. Don’t fuck up. Ex-offenders, they think they’re people. Johnny is still sensitive despite his recent incarceration. The human spiriit, Americans. It’s goddamn forgiving. Also, that’s how I imagine Al Pacino walks around in his daily life.

Frankie on the other hand. Pizza? She works in a diner. Why not bring some real food home? Eh, whatever. Sentimental Fool is blaring. OMG I forgot about her gay neighbor, Tim, and his many lovers. Everyone needs a Tim. I have one or two. Nathan Lane! Best Tim ever! haha he’s an actor and he’s hilarious.

Johnny misses his family. 😦 And he watches Jeopardy.

Tim is putting Bobby to work and making mental illness jokes. Michelle Pfieffer isn’t appreciated for her accent work; it’s really not bad. Understated. Very Method. Oh, right. HIV/AIDS was scary in the 1980s and 1990s. We hadn’t met Pedro from The Real World yet. Garry Marshall was edgy as fuck.

Johnny is still eating and watching Jeopardy.

Frankie is eating pizza while standing in her lonely kitchen. Everyone goes to bed. All the freaks that Frankie and Johnny work with and all their weird evening behaviors. haha One-liner lady makes a poop joke. Love it. The restarauranter has a nice family. Frankie and Johnny don’t.

Johnny meets a few of the neighborhood prostitutes. Is that fucking Annette Benning? He wants to spoon. No, it’s not A.B. They just spoon with clothing on. Frankie watches an old movie and laughs. Fucking pathetic all around. Jeezus.

Next day: Johnny’s chopping celery like Dana Carvey. The men are being extremely homoerotic. The slutty waitress reminds me of Chicky. She calls Johnny “Zoro!” Frankie just wants to eat. Johnny wants to do sex to her. They fight about the eggs. Johnny quotes Shapespeare’s Romio & Juliet. Oh, lord. She’s a real biotch. Is this movie supposed to be a Romeo & Juliet redux? Hmm…

Johnny is having a great time without giving two fucks. Frankie hates him. The redhead slut wants to do him and tells Frankie that she’s too picky. haha A little 80s feminism, which looks like 40s feminism, which looked like 1890s feminism. Ugh. 90s feminism can kill itself. Too soon to make suicidal ideation jokes?

Frankie is trying to figure out her VCR. The running joke in the 1990s was that VCRs always blinked 12:00. No one could work them. It’s really not that funny.

A strange interlude

Kevin called. I didn’t recognize the number at first. But, OMG. I was so happy to hear from him. He was happy and there were happy voices in the background. He was home. What a beautiful man in so many ways. He was about to take a bath and…oh my god. I wished I were in it. I can’t talk like this to anyone anymore. At Pine Rest, I had Shelley, Tabi and Chicky. Who have I got on the outside? Dylan. But, I’m in love with him, too. He’s not impartial. My husband and father-in-law are out of the house for now. But, soon they’ll be coming back and Ben will want to have a conversation about the state of our marriage. There is nothing I want to tell him that I haven’t already. So, I guess it’s back to the movie. It reminds me of Kevin. It also reminds me of Dylan. No one I know has their heads screwed on right. What about you? Same? Back to the flick.

INTERMISSION

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